Being Deaf

I’ve struggled for years to articulate what being hearing impaired and deaf was and is like.

The first video1 demonstrates what I heard with hearing aids. When I was 13, I got a cochlear implant. At that time my hearing with a hearing aid was somewhere around severe on the video’s scale.

The second video2 is what I heard with a cochlear implant when it was first turned on and for the first few months. Somewhere along the way the mental switch flipped and I just hear it as sound instead of a set of beeps and tones.

I now hear between most of the frequencies I should be expected to hear if I were a person with normal hearing. Because I never had the full range of frequencies as a kid, I never quite got and still don’t really have the mental map of what sounds are a given thing so I still rely on lip reading quite a bit and avoid using the phone and require captions or subtitles for movies or videos. If you ask the people who know me, I speak intelligibly and can usually make myself understood, and can understand what they say pretty well.


  1. Sourced from here 
  2. Sourced from here 

The Appeal of Bad Movies

Would you rather watch a great movie, or a terrible one?

I love movies. And I’m not sure I’d choose the great movie.

I love great movies. But I also love me some terrible movies. I’m just as happy and sometimes happier to be watching Santa’s Slay1 than watching something like The English Patient2.

Was thinking about why I liked some movies and realized I’d been watching a run of terrible movies via Netflix lately (purposely and with no small amusement). But most movies are either great, good, bad, so bad they’re great fun to watch, or just bland and pointless.

I’d rather watch a great to good movie, or one so bad it’s fun to watch and mock, than watch something just tepidly bad or bland. I especially detest the bland stuff because there’s no entertaining value and it feels like a pure waste of time. But a terrible, terrible movie like Freddy Got Fingered has some great moments where you wonder what was going on and how that movie got made and how it didn’t get stopped.

All this movie talk makes me ready to go and tackle Troll 2.


  1. Jewish ex-pro wrestler Bill Goldberg as Santa running around slaughtering people. Yeah! 
  2. Which I consider to be a great movie, and one that always moves me to tears.